Desperate male form letter of the day

Dear USER,

You are a woman of few words, but a picture is worth thousands of them, and your pictures say a lot about you. I gather that you are intelligent and have a very active social life. You have all the signs of a winner. I graduated from Harvard College in 1978, and earn much less than my classmates. I am a computer programmer for a university, and my salary is $20K a year. Having picked up three masters of science degrees along the way, I am convinced the only way to make more is to complete my Ph.D. in Physics, which could take another five years. I did not date for the last thirty years, having waited for a girl who promised me her hand in high school. Not having had much contact with her, my life was one of unrequited devotion. At the age of fifty one, one reevaluates his life to see what is in store for the future. I hanker for an active social life, one where I can talk or at least write answered letters. I love music, and listen to song or concerto almost all the time. I used to play the violin, having achieved fifth chair first violin in the Delaware All State Orchestra in high school, but my musical repertoire consists these days of listening rather than performing. I encourage all who love music to try her hand at it, but a listener's devotion to music is also respected. I wonder what is wrong with me, having chosen to wait for someone, and being in academia, the focus is on my intelligence. My post college IQ has been measured at 125 and 138, but I wonder if it is much less, having chosen the foolish path of waiting rather than interacting. I like to dine out at restaurants, and with a trust fund in left in my name, at least my rent is paid.

I wish you would share some of your life with me, so I can read about you and reply in kind. Most women know me as a very nice and kind person. Administrators often say I make them feel good about themselves, and my psychiatrist always wants me to write more letters to her. I suffer from manic depression, and often nights I stay up awake at the computer for this reason. I wonder how Thomas Edison passed his life, getting three hours of sleep at night, but today we would be minus his inventions if his busy mind had been asleep. The nights I spend awake, I work at engineering problems, not being able to sleep until they are solved.

Among the languages to your credit you include C++. I programmed in object oriented languages once, but they are long forgotten. One of the problems with manic depression is that the treatment I undergo, Electroconvulsive Therapy, is very quick acting and effective, but it causes one to forget. Along the way I have also learned French and Chinese, but the opportunity to use these fades with absence from school, and I recall these scarely better than C++.

It has been my life's dream to correspond with beautiful woman, and I hope you are the woman of my dreams. I don't smoke, drink or do drugs either, and do not understand why anyone would succumb to these dependent urges. Life has enough thrills and highs, and I have met many mentally ill people's whose lives are troubled enough by schizophrenia and manic depression, whose live's problems are compounded by chemical addiction. One woman lost custody of her children as a result of this.

If I have one flaw, it is that I am brutally honest about my weaknesses, and I have revealed them all to you. I hope you can see the pluses with the minuses and choose overall that it is to your advantage and will be a source of pleasure for us to correspond.

Thank you for your time, and I hope to hear from you soon.

Sincerely yours,


Ben